This blog is mainly for newbie dommes and Mistresses, however it may give some of you non dommes a chuckle too at the lengths some guys will go to for free kicks!
Some time wasters are very obvious whilst others are a little more subtle. Here is how to spot a guy who is wasting your time. This isn’t the full list by any means but a guide to those who pop up most frequently.
Definition of a time waster:
A time waster is not someone who messages you on a forum. That’s how social media works and it’s your choice whether you give your time to them or not.
A time waster is – someone who contacts you on your business number, business site or work e-mail address under the pretence of making a booking, but with no intentions of carrying it out.
Of course there are time wasters in all types of business, but this blog has particularly significant relevance to Dommes, Escorts, Models, Cam Girls and other jobs that involve working with the public.
Here are ten common types of time waster you will no doubt come across at some point. If you can spot the red flags before you commit time you will save yourself a lot of money and energy as well as safeguarding your safety.
The heavy breathing is usually a dead give away. He’s fiddling with his little chipolata and he’s doing it on your time. Questions will be heavily sexual “Have you got a strap-on? Will you fuck me up the bum? And will you make me take it deep?” This one is quite obvious and easy to spot he’ll struggle to keep you on the phone until the end of his wank sesh.
This one has a slight moral conscious and doesn’t want to be seen as a raging pervert, however he is still more than happy to time waste your with stupid questions that should be already on your profile.
“What size dress are you?” What size chest?” You will feel like you are being interviewed for a costume fitting. Once he runs out of body parts to size up, he’ll desperately rack his brains for yet more pointless questions to keep you talking to him.
“Errrr where you based? Um what do you charge?”
STOP RIGHT THERE!
This is a big no no. If someone has to ask where you are based and what you charge then they have no interest in a real booking, they just want to talk. Think about it, if you book a hair appointment or want to get your nails done? What’s the first thing you check? How close it is and the price. If someone hasn’t even bothered to look at your rates then they are not serious about booking.
Sometimes younger but generally old chaps in their 50’s and 60’s. They will generally start like this…
“Hello is that Mistress Kaz? Ah yes, good. Well, I happen to have seen you advertised in a magazine. Hmm yes. Wonderful. You do caning don’t you? Am I right?” (pauses very briefly for clarification although he already knows the answer) “Yes, well I am very much into being caned. Wonderful. And I used to see a Mistress called The Buster many years ago. Now she and I used to play a little game and….”
This guy will prattle on about his real or imagined old Mistress for as long as you let him. If you are curt and show signs of ending the call he will try and interject with yet more questions about what sort of floggers you have in excruciating detail – length, fabric, number of fronds. Fuck me these guys are so dull you probably wouldn’t even want to session with them if they offered to pay you a £1000 in advance!
Will send you endless texts about his fantasy. You may not ever even reply but you can be sure he will have a conversation with himself in your inbox. He may pop up on occasions to wish you Merry Christmas or Happy Halloween, but you can rest assured that he will never make a booking!
The Inbox Flasher
These come in various forms. You have the outright flasher who will send you unsolicited dick pics along with a message about how hard they are for you. This guy thinks you sit around all day with a wet gusset waiting for cock.
Then you have the subtle flasher. He’ll proclaim that he is concerned about his penis size. Would you be so kind as to have a look and massage his ego. Of course if he is into small penis humiliation he will love it if you tell him to stop wasting your time with his pathetic cock.
The Best Friend
You (possibly) spoke to hime once in 2014 for 5 minutes on Babechat/station/live. Now he thinks you are besties. He’ll text out of the blue – “Hi Stephanie, Oh man it’s been ages! How you doing? Would be great to catch up soon. Keep up the good work!” He actually thinks that you are going to hang out together. He’ll probably read a fact about you online such as you have a pet snake and try to use it as a conversation starter. He comes across as quite sweet but trust me they are all predators underneath!!
The Cool Guy
Guess what? he’s really not cool!
He’ll start with something like, “Hey, I’m not really into all that kinky stuff you do and I don’t normally do, this but can I take you to (insert swanky restaurant/bar/concert)”. The desperation is steaming out of him. If you only do domme then he’s implying he’s not into kink (because he wants to have sex with you otherwise why say it?) then he’s asking you for a date…on your work number…and doesn’t even know you. Need I say more?
A variation of this is the bragger. He will send you photo’s of a big house and nice sports cars. He’ll say something like he wants to book but would really like to take you to a VIP club first so you can get to know each other. If you are a gold digger you might fall for it. If you have any brains you’ll tell him he can get to know you during the booking.
The Guy With The Villa
“Hey I have a villa in Spain, Portugal, Greece. Do you fancy coming out for a holiday?” What he means is he wants a freebie. In return for staying at his villa (which will probably be some run down, cockroach infested pit) he’ll want to get his rocks off in return! Do you REALLY want to spend a week with some creep that might be a serial killer or at best have seriously dodgy breathe for NO money? Work hard and buy your own holiday!
The Wannabe Lodger
Begins like this “Hello I used to work for Mistress X and do all her chores and she let me sleep at the foot of her bed every night. If you have any jobs I could do in exchange for rent I would be more than willing to help.”
To save £8 an hour on a cleaner (or a couple of hours work) do you really want to have to compromise your privacy and have a stranger going through your drawers and have access to your house?
I still haven’t worked out if they guys are hobo’s trying to get lucky or piss takers after a freebie! I can guarantee though Mistress X doesn’t exist anywhere apart from in their minds.
The Deluded One
This guy wants you to think that you need him even though he has sweet FA to offer you.
“Hi Mistress, I do massage and am willing to offer you one for free. Also I enjoy being used by 5 or 6 girls at once. If you and your friends could use me for your films I don’t expect much payment. “
Bless him, he thinks he’s doing YOU a favour! Be sure to put him straight swiftly 😉 Like you are going to run around and organise his biggest fantasy for nothing, let alone give him a cut!
These guys might have different methods, but they all have one thing in common. They want your time for free, even if it is just on the phone. They won’t make a real booking, send you gifts or behave like subs, they just want to talk or try and wrangle a freebie. Be on your guard and cut them short politely. There are plenty of other subs out there who are worthy of your time and will turn up.
Try to avoid getting into a debate or conflict, this will just drag it out and they still have your attention, which they do not deserve. You don’t owe anybody anything apart from yourself. If you block them they will more than likely just get another sim so be sure to save detail notes under their number for example ‘Time Waster likes to ask about being pimped out/sniffing knickers/asks shoe size over and over.’ and silence their calls.
If you have time wasters try to call repeatedly at unsociable hours, you can go into your phones privacy settings and put on the ‘Do Not Disturb’ and set the times manually. Or have one phone for personal and one for work and either turn the work phone off or put it on do not disturb.’
They will soon enough find someone else to harass!
Stay safe ladies!
Mistress Kaz B