For some reason lots of guys seem to want me to have an opinion on their penises. Whether you call it curiosity, mild perversion or an exhibitionist streak – the photo’s come in by the dozen and they want to know ‘Is it small?’ ‘Is it big?’ ‘Does it look funny?’ ‘Is it normal?’
With this in mind, I decided that I would ask guys why they should be ‘Dinky Of The Week.’ I got lots of applicants, some strange, some funny and some just eeeeurgh! I picked out my favourites and decided to share them with you!
Del sent me this one and said.
“I would love to win dinky of the week! Unfortunately my willies not huge but I’ve added an optical illusion by wrapping a whip round my stomach – do I earn my stripes?”
I gave Del 6 out of 10 for creativity! He seems like the kind of guy that would go that extra mile and think outside the box. Plus the whip was a nice touch. Anything a little bit extra kinky gets the thumbs up from Princess Kaz!
Dave send me a photo of his bits errr sunbathing it would appear. Dave said
“Mistress Kaz, you must see pictures of horrible willies all the time and I am sure mine is no better. Therefore I will try my very hardest to make you laugh at least! Here is a picture of my little John Thomas pretending to be cool. I’ve had to think of horrible things just to get it to go down, now I’ll never get Ann Widdecombe out of my mind – I feel mentally scarred!”
I’m not sure about this one. At first it appeared calm and relaxed but on second viewing I felt that it was avoiding eye contact with me – never a good thing. Also it appears to be curling up like a terrified hedgehog in oncoming traffic!
As if that wasn’t enough – Dave made me think of Ann Widdecombe, so I have taken off points for that and I am awarding him 5/10!
Jip sent me this one and said:
“Mistress Kaz, clear out your calendar! I’m a real stud muffin and I can be your Superman. I’m faster than a speeding bullet and more powerful than a locomotive! Want to be my Lois Lane?”
Sorry Jip – you lost me at “Faster than a speeding bullet!” It sounds like you are looking for a Super Express McShag! I’d much rather lock that thing in chastity and bend you over my lap for a good hard spanking! 3/10! The 3 points awarded are for spelling my name right!
Tim sent me this photo and said:
“This photo is a reminder that we should celebrate all year round – a sub is for life, not just for Christmas! I’d love you to jingle my balls all the way but I would settle for a couple of paddles on the backside and a suck on your biggest strap-on! I may be a naughty freak – but I’d love to win Dinky Of The Week!”
I liked Tim’s spirit, even though his man bits looked a sad little package…a Richmond sausage squashed between two of Pat Butcher’s earrings. I liked his kinky mind set though, his humility and his desire for humiliation. The tiebreaker element also swung the deal! Therefore I awarded Tim with an astonishing 7/10 – making him winner of Dinky Of The Week!
Tim will receive a ‘Well done for not having a penis as shit as the others’ e-mail as his prize. Well done Tim and well done to all the other entrants for their creativity and for indeed – making me laugh!